Scandals & Other Good Stuff

There is something profoundly proper and pleasing about a terrorist--a wealthy young man to boot--who sets his own leg on fire while trying to detonate a bomb in an airplane. Let us hope that this is the future of terrorism, even as we know it is not. It's a fitting end to a decade that actually started on September 11 nine years ago and has kept us if not on our toes, at least on our feet, largely disbelieving that anyone could hate us with such virulence.

There's an argument to be made that this past decade has been one of failure and discontent. Certainly, it has been neither the best nor the brightest. We've seen century-old institutions vanish, victims to amazing greed and ineptitude. Here, in the land of the free and the home of the brave, many brave have lost their homes and are no longer free. We have elected a black man thinking he was a black Jesus and are still waiting for the loaves and fishes.

Lets face it, it has been a crappy ten years.

The popular music stinks, we're mired in vampiric literature, tacky architecture, ugly fashion and larger traffic jams. Modern art is, well, neither.

Facebook, MySpace, Tweeter and a host of other non-essential time-wasters have proven conclusively that we are getting better and better at communicating more and more to say less and less.

My favorite failure of the decade is Dubai, an essentially non-existent country that, in spite of being in the black with trillions of dollars a mere five years ago, is now in bankruptcy.

My favorite politician remains George W. Bush who in full view of the world stole and election, thereby putting to shame all the Third- and Fourth-World leaders who have done the same with more style and less elan.

My favorite financier is Bernie Madoff. My Jewish friends want to de-circumcise him and make him a Christian.

My Favorite religious leader is the good Reverend Tedd Haggard, founder of the New Life Church in Colorado Springs. A charismatic pastor, Haggard was a vocal critic of homosexuality until he was outed by a male prostitute who claimed to be involved with the Reverend for more than three years. Oh, and Haggard apparently liked crystal meth during gay sex, too.

There's more--of course there's more--just Google "10 worst" anything and feast your eyes. Come up with your own list and forward it!

But please, no Salahis. I'm trying to keep this blog in good taste.