Newt! Newt! Newt!

Let us, as a friend of mine is fond of saying, nip this notion right in the butt. Newt Gingrich will not become the next—or any—President of the United  States. If he did, I would have to leave the area, if not the country.

Let me explain. I live in Northern Virginia, a few miles from the Nation’s Capital, close to—but not in—a highly exclusive neighborhood called McLean. Very rich people live in McLean, as does the Secretary of Defense, several congressmen, plastic surgeons, attorneys and other worthies without whom the country would certainly not survive. Newt lives in McLean as well. I occasionally run into him at the McLean Family Restaurant, a township icon venerated for its baked tilapia. Newt and a couple of bodyguards with thing in their ears show up there so he can presses the flesh, though I am
happy to say he has never even attempted to press mine. A vast relief, that!

I am sort of fanatical about Newt.  I think he’s a very smart man, perhaps an intellectual giant and certainly taller than one might expect for a moral midget. As a master of the double- and triple-speak he has come to define the concept of ‘Ready, fire, aim.”  This is not what you want in a Chief Executive.

Here, courtesy of The Nation magazine, are eleven Newt quotes that should leave both liberals and
conservatives scratching their respective (or each other's) heads. 

(1) “I am convinced that if we do not decisively win the struggle over the nature of America, by the time [my grandchildren are] my age they will be in a secular atheist country, potentially one dominated by radical Islamists and with no understanding of what it once meant to be an American.” [Address to Cornerstone Church in Texas, March 2011]

(2) “The idea that a congressman would be tainted by accepting money from private industry or private sources is essentially a socialist argument.” [To Mother Jones magazine, October 1989]

(3)  “All I would say is, why did it take so long? The whole thing is strange.” [Speaking about the recent release of President Obama’s long-form birth certificate, April 2011]

(4) “What if [Obama] is so outside our comprehension, that only if you understand Kenyan, anti-colonial behavior, can you begin to piece together [his actions]? That is the most accurate, predictive model for his behavior.” [To the National Review, September 2010]

(5) “It doesn’t matter what I do. People need to hear what I have to say. There’s no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn’t matter what I live.” – [Newt’s explanation for why his multiple affairs won’t damage his political fortunes, as told to his jilted wife.]

(6) “The secular socialist machine represents as great a threat to America as Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union once did.” [In his book To Save America: Stopping Obama's Secular-Socialist Machine, May 2010.]

(7) “This is one of the great tragedies of the Bush administration. The more successful they’ve been at intercepting and stopping bad guys, the less proof there is that we’re in danger…. It’s almost like they should every once in a while have allowed an attack to get through just to remind us.” [At a book
signing in Huntington, NY, April 2008]

(8) "A mere 40 years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that's what freedom is all about.” [At the Republican National Convention, August 1996]

(9) “I want to say to the elite of this country—the elite news media, the liberal academic elite, the liberal political elite: I accuse you in Littleton…of being afraid to talk about the mess you have made, and being afraid to take responsibility for things you have done, and instead foisting upon the rest of
us pathetic banalities because you don’t have the courage to look at the world you have created.”  [Speaking about the Columbine shootings, May 1999]

(10) “How can you have the mess we have in New Orleans, and not have had deep investigations of the federal government, the state government, the city government, and the failure of citizenship in the Ninth Ward, where 22,000 people were so uneducated and so unprepared, they literally couldn't get out of the way of a hurricane.” [Speaking at the Conservative Political Action Conference, March
2007]

(11) “I’m running for President.” [5/11/2011]

‘Nuff said.